One thing.

Here I sit leaning against a pillar on Blinn College Campus. It's almost nine and no one seems to be here. I know that's not true because many classes are still in session. I'm watching Merlin and it is a fine night out. I stop and wonder how much glory and beautiful goes unnoticed.
The proud Texas flag waves on the autumn breeze, the moth dances around the lamp post, crickets, distant cars, and very little else. Most of all the full moon is glowing with the sun's light. We spend so much time in cars, inside, online, using phones. Me more than any. I so wish I stopped to admire the moment. I see every moment as a passing thing that will be here no more and what will be lost? And thinking farther out into the night sky I think of all the stars, the planets, galaxies we've never seen! So much we're missing! Of course there is beauty and glory to come but this moment is just for this time. Comes and goes. Just that simple but means so much now, here in Bryan, Texas this October night.
There's comfort in two things right now. The first being the knowledge of the coming Kingdom. God will receive more glory then than this world has ever been capable of. Second I know that creation its self also brings glory to God, whether I acknowledge it or not. That's a comforting thing, though I know He doesn't need my praise. We though, being the final work of creation, being made in God's image, are called to a higher calling of worship.
God was perfectly fine before I ever came along but I know He want's my praise and I know He deserves glory and most of all I want to worship. It's my aim to find all the little things worth praising God's name for.


         One thing I have desired of the LORD,
         That will I seek:
         That I may dwell in the house of the LORD
         All the days of my life,
         To behold the beauty of the LORD,
         And to inquire in His temple.


This is it. This is the call that David felt and wrote on in Psalm 27 and that is what I have felt. I desire to seek the Truth of God in His Word and know Him. To see His beauty. To chase the rainbows.

Recent Thoughts: Worship and knowing Christ

It's almost been a month since my last post and with my first four weeks of college under my belt you'd think I've have a lot to say but really I feel like I could just rant about whatever for the longest time and that's not really what I wanted this blog for.

One thing I do want to talk about in the midst of all my stupid issues and just life being life is a book called Radical by David Platt. I'm partway through the second chapter and it's already one of the most exciting books I've read in a long while. I'm a literal guy and when I'm for something I'll die for it. So when this book encourages the passion for Christ in me I hardly can contain myself on the bus from A&M to Blinn. Christ is alive and He's a real guy. Now I know Him personally but sometimes I forgot that Jesus is more than a static savior. He is the most opinionated, most influential and most personal person you could ever meet. He has His way and it's the right one. I know all this sounds like Christian jargon and may bounce off the walls of learned minds like it did mine but hear this. Jesus is life. He was there in the beginning and He's here and now. Jesus is everything.
I was at Breakaway on Tuesday night and the worship leader simply said in one of those emotional instrumental song transitions to "think of all Jesus has done for you." I almost laughed. Everything He's done? I cried. For someone to think of all that Jesus has done for them is to die. To consider all the moments Christ guided me and all the times He was showing me Truth? That leaves me totally shaken. All the moment in Africa, at camp, at home, here and wherever coming to mind where I was aware of Jesus at work in my life. Blew me away.

Lately I've been thinking about God and who He says He is. When we sing about God we often stay in the safe zone of songs we can lift our hands too and smile at. Things that are true, of course, and perfect parts of God's character but it's like (in crude terms) describing an elephant and spending ten minutes on the trunk and never even mentioning the ears. God is loving, he is merciful and we are saved by His grace but in this I feel like we can loose a part of Who we worship. I've been reading through the minor prophets lately and I've loved it. One of my personal favorite moments is when God refers to Himself as "...a bear deprived of her cubs; I will tear open their rib cage, And there I will devour them like a lion." (Hosea 13:8) Yup. Today I read Habakkuk 3 and I highly recommend it.
Now I'm not saying we need to stop singing about how Jesus loves us but I feel like people forget that He's a forced to be reckoned with and that one day He will be returning with a holy army and a flipping sword coming from his mouth to judge the world, killing thousands of people. Maybe a little reverence? I remember reading so many Psalms to myself and just sort of skipping over the last few verses talking about the destruction of the wicked. Are we opposed to justice? Love wins, to be sure, but that's because Love freaking destroys what's not in Love. Do we read the Bible the way we like it to be? Do we accept just what we like about Jesus? Can I be accused of trying to create a Jesus "Michael" Christ? Yes, I think so. I don't think we need to be singing songs in church that go a bit more like: "Praise God, who commanded the death of nations, ever man, woman and child." But we do need to remember that He means business and isn't messing around.
Bringing it back to that book, he asks two questions about reading the Bible. "Was I going to believe Jesus?" and "Was I going to obey Jesus?" Jesus says crazy stuff. Are we going to listen?

All this goes to say a few things. I feel motivated to share Christ's truth so much right now and I feel like Blinn College is a perfect place to start. It's so small and the people there are so lost and apathetic and they're surrounded by a community of people seeking God. Lets do something! Jesus is alive in me and He will not be silent.

My cup runs over.

It has been quite some time and I do not have the time or the heart to share all that's happened. I've seen God at work this summer, I've come to know Him, others and myself better. I've cried, I've laughed, I've learned.

Tonight I sit surrounded by all the stuff God's graced me with, Skype calling with great friends. I've moved to college and God has been showing me His provision. With providing everything I need and so much of what I want and things I wouldn't have thought to ask for. I could tell stories of finical aid, free chest of drawers on the side of the road, a long forgotten desk returning, getting into classes I registered for late and my amazing parents and grandparents paying for the things I couldn't afford. I'm well looked after and well equipped and I praise the Lord for that.

I am so excited for this year. There is so much unknown to be afraid of that I can place in God's hands. I'm up against an invisible enemy in the dark with the purest Light at hand. This is a battle and it's worth fighting.

Tomorrow's Song

So there's an event that was supposed to just have happened on the 27th but I thought I would join in late. Jon Foreman suggested everyone write a song and the title "Tomorrow's Song" was picked and now there have been over 250 of these like-titled songs written. Here's mine.

Pray the last two hours back just to worry them away,

Yesterday we were all still kids but we're all grown up today,

No more time to sit on the roof and dream about revolution,

Everyone has gone along and gone to something new,

May not have made up our minds on what to do but we're doing it,

I've settled down in a familiar town in a comfy chair,

Just to watch myself lose my hair,

Oh tell me is this tomorrow's song?

Whatever happened to all our dreams?

Oh tell me is this tomorrow's song?

I never saw the shift in priority, has this happened to me? Oh!

We all have lives,

Will we choose to live?

We can change this would with all we can give,

And will we stand?

Or just take a seat?

Tell me are you Man or a piece of meat?

We can write tomorrow's song,

We are the generation of the strong,

It's not just about the way we greet the people living in the street,

Putting shoes on every orphan's feet,

Or trying not to drink so much,

It's the way we live day to day,

A quite rebellion in every heart,

Crying out for a second start,

Oh tell me is this tomorrow's song?

Can we still try to live our dreams?

Oh tell me is this tomorrow's song?

What if the whole world sang along?

Piano

5/27/10

 Who was the first to cry at the sound of a chord?

When was the first piano and song for it to sing?

How many have been ministered toby its passion?

Like the entertainment of the angels?

He plays in the dark,

Alone with his sighs,

Deep in the strength of the living song,

And the silent unknown sitter,

The quiet room is drowned in the echoing sway,

The sway of the sound and emotion,

He leans low over the keys,

Moving as a captive to the deluge,

The light of the moon washes across him,

With every breath of the song.

Father and farther into the emotion they sank,

In longing, loss and hope,

The song it danced,

A solemn sprite in her first and last dance,

The world swayed to her movement,

The stars sang along.

But the final note faded,

The pianist gave his last sigh,

The sitter was left alone as the door silently closed,

He slowly stood,

Sacred silence preserved,

And as a changed man,

Left.

A world far brighter.

So often the best thoughts come to you after being in bed for hours. After this episode I looked at the clock to see it's arms spread eagle. 3:45am ladies and gentleman, but I like the product.

Some day and some day soon I shall be born and I will enter a world far greater than what I have ever known. I don't know when but it will be soon. I will put a face to the voice I've come to know and love from the womb and I will be held in arms I have always longed for.
"All has lead to this." I will say, "This is the start of life and I can't wait to learn to run."

What do you want to be remembered as?

I've heard a lot of questions like this before but I've never really taken many seriously. Context I guess. When Kyle asked this I was open to think. It wasn't "What do you want on your grave stone" or stuff like that, it was worth thinking about because it made a difference. The answer to that question should shed light on how you live your life day by day, or at least how you desire to.
After some thought, pushing past all the different answers that sounded good and all the things that came to mind, I found the core of the honest truth of what I wanted to be remembered as. Whenever I leave a place, be it a room, a lunch, camp, conference, state, country or life, I want to be remembered as a man who knew God. A man who was familiar with God, was in His counsel, chilled with Him a lot, however you want to put it. This is it. Am I that guy? No, I know I'm not but that wont stop me now. I turned 18 two days ago, I'm young and God is always waiting to hang out.

Now I don't want you to feel pressured to think mine is the only good answer (or a good answer at all) but I want to ask you the same question. Who do you want to be remembered as?